I was in the hallway of Our Lady of Lourdes High School when I received a phone call from a very close friend of mine from my high school years, Gary Kucich,  informing me that another very close friend of mine, Tom Emma, had taken his own life a few hours before. Gary, Tom, Rob Anastasia and I were as close as any friends could be.  Fortunately, I was in close proximity to the school principal, Father Lagiovane, who was able to help me deal with the situation at hand for the next few hours, and then days. Father Lagiovane had the difficult task of calling my wife to tell her, and then called my son Kyle into the office where I was, so that he could tell him, something I could not do.

My immediate reaction to the news of Toms passing was that a piece of me had died with him.  Since then, my emotional state has somewhat changed as I moved from mourning his loss, to consoling his family, and then to begin the healing and recovery process.  After being with his family, my family, and my friends, I no longer feel that a piece of me has died.  Here is why.

Growing up in Manhasset, it was hard not to know who Tom was.  He was the kid that scored 101 points in a CYO game in 5th grade, and then had a repeat performance as a 6th grader, where he only scored 99.  Gosh, I was lucky to score that many points in an entire season!  But the result was that Manhasset High School was waiting anxiously for Tom to grow up and attend High School.  When he arrived at Manhasset Junior High as a 7th grader, he was not allowed to participate on the Junior High team because of his age.  He did play as an 8th grader and created quite a buzz in the school as he led his team to an undefeated season. Everyone knew who he was, including me, but I did not know him personally.

One Friday night, I was at a typical high school party.  I was surprised to see Tom there. He was friends with the younger brother of my friend who lived at the house.  I was a 6’2” lanky, uncoordinated, skinny teenager, that was on the basketball team because I was tall. I didn’t invest much time into the sport other than occasionally shooting in my driveway.  Never played CYO and never went to camp.  Tom started a conversation with me and convinced me to meet him at Christopher Morley Park the next morning.  “Morley” was the park where hundreds of kids went to play basketball.

That Friday night was a life changing moment for me.  As most teenagers will experience, there are many roads that one can choose as they move through high school and into adulthood.  Some of those roads aren’t always the best ones to take.  I for one, was heading down one of the bad ones. After being dropped off at the park at 4am by one of my buddies, I fell asleep on a park bench and awoke to Tom nudging me with his sneaker about 5 hours later.  From that point on, Tom introduced me to the world of basketball.  I would realize later in life that in that world was a whole new group of friends, a sense of work ethic, a sense of commitment, a sense of direction.

I slowly became friends with, who was eventually going to be, the best basketball player and person I have ever known.  I trained with Tommy through high school and college for hours and hours and hours each day during the summer.  Played hundreds if not thousands of games of one on one.  I didn’t win many . . . if any, but I wasn’t alone.  If I did win a game on occasion, I always knew it was because he let me despite his attempts to make me believe that I earned it.  After an incredible High School career where he broke just about every scoring record in the school, county, and state, he went on to play for Duke University. He was named captain his senior year.  He was drafted by the Chicago Bulls but never played due to injuries.

Tom later earned his masters at Columbia University and then went into the commercial real estate business for a short time.  He founded Power Performance, a company that specializes in training athletes at all levels and is the author of five books in the field.  In addition, Tom was a well respected trainer in the NBA and was a consultant to many professional athletes.

On the morning of my wedding, Tommy, Gary, Robert, and a few of my other friends went to play some last minute ball.  I remember him telling me that we better not get hurt.  Well, he rolled his ankle, and although it was minor, I never heard the end of it.

This past Friday, after making the trip to Long Island each of the prior days since his passing, logistics prevented me from making it down that afternoon.  Needless to say, my son Kyle asked if we could go to the gym that night.  Although all of my kids were close to Tom in one way, shape, or form, Kyle had a special, unexplainable bond with him.  The two of us just needed to get to the gym.  Well, then Chris came, then Kelby, then Robbie, all for the same reason. All four of my boys needed to be in the gym together for me, and for each other. Two turned into three, and then four, and then five, and then before I knew it, we had a gym full of athletes.

Some did not know that Tom passed away or why we were there that night other than to just play some ball, nor should they have known since it was not unusual at all for us to be there.  No one said a word about it. We just played, it got competitive, and then I went down and sprained my ankle and tore the ACL in my knee.  A day before I was going to say goodbye to him, I injured myself doing something that I love to do, something that Tommy had given to me.  In hindsight, I don’t regret playing that night. . . and I don’t regret the injury either.

Both Tommy and Gary are board members for Edge and have worked with me to help develop my programs. Tom trained me for the last 5 years so that I could train others at a high level, and provided guidance to me in almost every aspect of my life.  He began working with Kyle this past year. He also trained Gary’s two kids, Nolan and Alec. Although our kids live a distance away and don’t see each other often, it was interesting to see the bond that Alec and Kyle began to develop with each other as a result of their loss.

For over 30 years, Tom was a personal inspiration to me.  To say that Tom was my best friend would be missing the point.  He is responsible for who I am and what I do today, and why my passion to teach our youth continues to burn.  I am proud to say that he was my idol. Although, at times, we didn’t talk for months because of our own busy schedules, there wasn’t a day that went by that I did not think about him or mention his name to someone else for one reason or another.  Most of the students who have been in my program have heard me speak of him.

The days since Toms passing have been long and hard.  I cannot say that I will ever fully recover.  However, Tommy’s presence in my life and my family’s lives is as strong as ever.  No . . . a piece of me did not die last week.  Instead, a piece of Tommy’s life will live on inside of me, and with my wife, my kids, and all of those that he touched . . . forever.

My prayers are with him, his mom and dad, his sister Liz and husband Mark, and his nephew Jack.

First, I thank all of you for the kind words that I received over the past week.  Whether they were said to me in person, text message, email, or left as a voicemail, they were all very much appreciated.  And although I have not responded to all of them, I did listen to and read each one.

I was in the hallway of Our Lady of Lourdes High School when I received a phone call from a very close friend of mine from my high school years, Gary Kucich,  informing me that another very close friend of mine, Tom Emma, had taken his own life a few hours before. Gary, Tom, Rob Anastasia and I were as close as any friends could be.  Fortunately, I was in close proximity to the school principal, Father Lagiovane, who was able to help me deal with the situation at hand for the next few hours, and then days. Father Lagiovane had the difficult task of calling my wife to tell her, and then called my son Kyle into the office where I was, so that he could tell him, something I could not do.

My immediate reaction to the news of Toms passing was that a piece of me had died with him.  Since then, my emotional state has somewhat changed as I moved from mourning his loss, to consoling his family, and then to begin the healing and recovery process.  After being with his family, my family, and my friends, I no longer feel that a piece of me has died.  Here is why.

Growing up in Manhasset, it was hard not to know who Tom was.  He was the kid that scored 101 points in a CYO game in 5th grade, and then had a repeat performance as a 6th grader, where he only scored 99.  Gosh, I was lucky to score that many points in an entire season!  But the result was that Manhasset High School was waiting anxiously for Tom to grow up and attend High School.  When he arrived at Manhasset Junior High as a 7th grader, he was not allowed to participate on the Junior High team because of his age.  He did play as an 8th grader and created quite a buzz in the school as he led his team to an undefeated season. Everyone knew who he was, including me, but I did not know him personally.

One Friday night, I was at a typical high school party.  I was surprised to see Tom there. He was friends with the younger brother of my friend who lived at the house.  I was a 6’2” lanky, uncoordinated, skinny teenager, that was on the basketball team because I was tall. I didn’t invest much time into the sport other than occasionally shooting in my driveway.  Never played CYO and never went to camp.  Tom started a conversation with me and convinced me to meet him at Christopher Morley Park the next morning.  “Morley” was the park where hundreds of kids went to play basketball.

That Friday night was a life changing moment for me.  As most teenagers will experience, there are many roads that one can choose as they move through high school and into adulthood.  Some of those roads aren’t always the best ones to take.  I for one, was heading down one of the bad ones. After being dropped off at the park at 4am by one of my buddies, I fell asleep on a park bench and awoke to Tom nudging me with his sneaker about 5 hours later.  From that point on, Tom introduced me to the world of basketball.  I would realize later in life that in that world was a whole new group of friends, a sense of work ethic, a sense of commitment, a sense of direction.

I slowly became friends with, who was eventually going to be, the best basketball player and person I have ever known.  I trained with Tommy through high school and college for hours and hours and hours each day during the summer.  Played hundreds if not thousands of games of one on one.  I didn’t win many . . . if any, but I wasn’t alone.  If I did win a game on occasion, I always knew it was because he let me despite his attempts to make me believe that I earned it.  After an incredible High School career where he broke just about every scoring record in the school, county, and state, he went on to play for Duke University. He was named captain his senior year.  He was drafted by the Chicago Bulls but never played due to injuries.

Tom later earned his masters at Columbia University and then went into the commercial real estate business for a short time.  He founded Power Performance, a company that specializes in training athletes at all levels and is the author of five books in the field.  In addition, Tom was a well respected trainer in the NBA and was a consultant to many professional athletes.

On the morning of my wedding, Tommy, Gary, Robert, and a few of my other friends went to play some last minute ball.  I remember him telling me that we better not get hurt.  Well, he rolled his ankle, and although it was minor, I never heard the end of it.

This past Friday, after making the trip to Long Island each of the prior days since his passing, logistics prevented me from making it down that afternoon.  Needless to say, my son Kyle asked if we could go to the gym that night.  Although all of my kids were close to Tom in one way, shape, or form, Kyle had a special, unexplainable bond with him.  The two of us just needed to get to the gym.  Well, then Chris came, then Kelby, then Robbie, all for the same reason. All four of my boys needed to be in the gym together for me, and for each other. Two turned into three, and then four, and then five, and then before I knew it, we had a gym full of athletes.

Some did not know that Tom passed away or why we were there that night other than to just play some ball, nor should they have known since it was not unusual at all for us to be there.  No one said a word about it. We just played, it got competitive, and then I went down and sprained my ankle and tore the ACL in my knee.  A day before I was going to say goodbye to him, I injured myself doing something that I love to do, something that Tommy had given to me.  In hindsight, I don’t regret playing that night. . . and I don’t regret the injury either.

Both Tommy and Gary are board members for Edge and have worked with me to help develop my programs. Tom trained me for the last 5 years so that I could train others at a high level, and provided guidance to me in almost every aspect of my life.  He began working with Kyle this past year. He also trained Gary’s two kids, Nolan and Alec. Although our kids live a distance away and don’t see each other often, it was interesting to see the bond that Alec and Kyle began to develop with each other as a result of their loss.

For over 30 years, Tom was a personal inspiration to me.  To say that Tom was my best friend would be missing the point.  He is responsible for who I am and what I do today, and why my passion to teach our youth continues to burn.  I am proud to say that he was my idol. Although, at times, we didn’t talk for months because of our own busy schedules, there wasn’t a day that went by that I did not think about him or mention his name to someone else for one reason or another.  Most of the students who have been in my program have heard me speak of him.

The days since Toms passing have been long and hard.  I cannot say that I will ever fully recover.  However, Tommy’s presence in my life and my family’s lives is as strong as ever.  No . . . a piece of me did not die last week.  Instead, a piece of Tommy’s life will live on inside of me, and with my wife, my kids, and all of those that he touched . . . forever.

My prayers are with him, his mom and dad, his sister Liz and husband Mark, and his nephew Jack.

First, I thank all of you for the kind words that I received over the past week.  Whether they were said to me in person, text message, email, or left as a voicemail, they were all very much appreciated.  And although I have not responded to all of them, I did listen to and read each one.

I was in the hallway of Our Lady of Lourdes High School when I received a phone call from a very close friend of mine from my high school years, Gary Kucich,  informing me that another very close friend of mine, Tom Emma, had taken his own life a few hours before. Gary, Tom, Rob Anastasia and I were as close as any friends could be.  Fortunately, I was in close proximity to the school principal, Father Lagiovane, who was able to help me deal with the situation at hand for the next few hours, and then days. Father Lagiovane had the difficult task of calling my wife to tell her, and then called my son Kyle into the office where I was, so that he could tell him, something I could not do.

My immediate reaction to the news of Toms passing was that a piece of me had died with him.  Since then, my emotional state has somewhat changed as I moved from mourning his loss, to consoling his family, and then to begin the healing and recovery process.  After being with his family, my family, and my friends, I no longer feel that a piece of me has died.  Here is why.

Growing up in Manhasset, it was hard not to know who Tom was.  He was the kid that scored 101 points in a CYO game in 5th grade, and then had a repeat performance as a 6th grader, where he only scored 99.  Gosh, I was lucky to score that many points in an entire season!  But the result was that Manhasset High School was waiting anxiously for Tom to grow up and attend High School.  When he arrived at Manhasset Junior High as a 7th grader, he was not allowed to participate on the Junior High team because of his age.  He did play as an 8th grader and created quite a buzz in the school as he led his team to an undefeated season. Everyone knew who he was, including me, but I did not know him personally.

One Friday night, I was at a typical high school party.  I was surprised to see Tom there. He was friends with the younger brother of my friend who lived at the house.  I was a 6’2” lanky, uncoordinated, skinny teenager, that was on the basketball team because I was tall. I didn’t invest much time into the sport other than occasionally shooting in my driveway.  Never played CYO and never went to camp.  Tom started a conversation with me and convinced me to meet him at Christopher Morley Park the next morning.  “Morley” was the park where hundreds of kids went to play basketball.

That Friday night was a life changing moment for me.  As most teenagers will experience, there are many roads that one can choose as they move through high school and into adulthood.  Some of those roads aren’t always the best ones to take.  I for one, was heading down one of the bad ones. After being dropped off at the park at 4am by one of my buddies, I fell asleep on a park bench and awoke to Tom nudging me with his sneaker about 5 hours later.  From that point on, Tom introduced me to the world of basketball.  I would realize later in life that in that world was a whole new group of friends, a sense of work ethic, a sense of commitment, a sense of direction.

I slowly became friends with, who was eventually going to be, the best basketball player and person I have ever known.  I trained with Tommy through high school and college for hours and hours and hours each day during the summer.  Played hundreds if not thousands of games of one on one.  I didn’t win many . . . if any, but I wasn’t alone.  If I did win a game on occasion, I always knew it was because he let me despite his attempts to make me believe that I earned it.  After an incredible High School career where he broke just about every scoring record in the school, county, and state, he went on to play for Duke University. He was named captain his senior year.  He was drafted by the Chicago Bulls but never played due to injuries.

Tom later earned his masters at Columbia University and then went into the commercial real estate business for a short time.  He founded Power Performance, a company that specializes in training athletes at all levels and is the author of five books in the field.  In addition, Tom was a well respected trainer in the NBA and was a consultant to many professional athletes.

On the morning of my wedding, Tommy, Gary, Robert, and a few of my other friends went to play some last minute ball.  I remember him telling me that we better not get hurt.  Well, he rolled his ankle, and although it was minor, I never heard the end of it.

This past Friday, after making the trip to Long Island each of the prior days since his passing, logistics prevented me from making it down that afternoon.  Needless to say, my son Kyle asked if we could go to the gym that night.  Although all of my kids were close to Tom in one way, shape, or form, Kyle had a special, unexplainable bond with him.  The two of us just needed to get to the gym.  Well, then Chris came, then Kelby, then Robbie, all for the same reason. All four of my boys needed to be in the gym together for me, and for each other. Two turned into three, and then four, and then five, and then before I knew it, we had a gym full of athletes.

Some did not know that Tom passed away or why we were there that night other than to just play some ball, nor should they have known since it was not unusual at all for us to be there.  No one said a word about it. We just played, it got competitive, and then I went down and sprained my ankle and tore the ACL in my knee.  A day before I was going to say goodbye to him, I injured myself doing something that I love to do, something that Tommy had given to me.  In hindsight, I don’t regret playing that night. . . and I don’t regret the injury either.

Both Tommy and Gary are board members for Edge and have worked with me to help develop my programs. Tom trained me for the last 5 years so that I could train others at a high level, and provided guidance to me in almost every aspect of my life.  He began working with Kyle this past year. He also trained Gary’s two kids, Nolan and Alec. Although our kids live a distance away and don’t see each other often, it was interesting to see the bond that Alec and Kyle began to develop with each other as a result of their loss.

For over 30 years, Tom was a personal inspiration to me.  To say that Tom was my best friend would be missing the point.  He is responsible for who I am and what I do today, and why my passion to teach our youth continues to burn.  I am proud to say that he was my idol. Although, at times, we didn’t talk for months because of our own busy schedules, there wasn’t a day that went by that I did not think about him or mention his name to someone else for one reason or another.  Most of the students who have been in my program have heard me speak of him.

The days since Toms passing have been long and hard.  I cannot say that I will ever fully recover.  However, Tommy’s presence in my life and my family’s lives is as strong as ever.  No . . . a piece of me did not die last week.  Instead, a piece of Tommy’s life will live on inside of me, and with my wife, my kids, and all of those that he touched . . . forever.

My prayers are with him, his mom and dad, his sister Liz and husband Mark, and his nephew Jack.

The Edge Athletics Basketball Camp held at Our lady of Lourdes High School in Poughkeepsie has set dates for the 2011 summer.  There will be three traditional camp weeks for boys and girls ages 6-15.  The dates are as follows:

Session I:  June 27 - July 1
Session II: July 11 - July 15
Session III:  July 18 - 22

Offensive Skills and Shooting: July 26, 27, 28

The camp has expanded to include 15 year old athletes and will feature the “Get an Edge” division.  This division will be highly competitive and will focus on high intense instruction and competition.  For more information or to download a brochure/application, please visit our camp section by clicking here. You may also contact us at 845-264-5078.

Applications are now being accepted for 2011 and are due by July 1.  Winners will be announced by July 31.

The Edge Athletics College Scholarship, re-named in honor of the late Dr. Roger Yerry of Rhinebeck, New York.  Dr. Yerry,  passed away on January 22, 2007.  He was an avid supporter of Edge Athletics.  His son Adam was a member of the original Hudson Valley River Rats team that was formed in 1996 and played every year until he graduated from Rhinebeck High School.  The Yerry family experienced the growth and transition of the River Rats to the current Edge Athletics program.  “Dr. Yerry was a very close friend of Edge Athletics and helped guide our growth with his insight and encouragement,” said Jim Santoro. “He meant a lot to me not only as a parent of one of our athletes, but as physician, friend, and consultant, and I am very excited and proud to have our scholarship named in his honor” he added.

Edge Ahtletics started the scholarship in 2006 and has given the award to nine athletes.  For more information and to download an application, Click Here.

One of the first River Rats teams.

The scholarship fund was first created in 2006 to commemorate the 10 year anniversary of Edge Athletics. Although only one athlete was awarded this year, two are available.   Since the scholarships inception, Edge Athletics has awarded eight athletes, not including McClendon.  Last year, the scholarship was renamed and dedicated to the late Dr. Roger Yerry, a prominent Hudson Valley physician who’s son Adam was a member of the first team called the River Rats. Dr. Yerry was an avid supporter of the Edge program and also served as team medical consultant. “There isn’t any other parent that I would rather have honored than Dr. Yerry,” Santoro said.

My brother, Bill, is a physician in Reading Pennsylvania and a Marathon runner.  He regularly writes columns and stories that relate to sports and running.  I have told him that I plan on giving him some space on the Edge site for his work that is relevant to our athletes and families.  This is not one of them….but for some reason I cannot exactly explain……I am posting his email to me.

Here it is…..

“I have sent this email out every year since 2003, the second anniversary of the September 11 attacks. I will continue to send it out every year…  for pictures of the WTC remembered, see my facebook page…

It is another anniversary of the attacks on us. September 11 is our generation’s December 7. This date too will go down in infamy. Everyone I talk to remembers exactly what he or she was doing when they heard about the Twin Towers getting hit. Most people have a similar story, heard it was a small plane, probably an accident.

I had had an argument with my wife that morning. I listened on the radio and television in the waiting room of my office as the events unfolded. I was finishing up at noon. By this point the reality of the situation had set in. And my wife walked into the office. We didn’t say a word. We just held each other. Words were not needed.

My brother worked across the street from Tower 1. My sister lived 10 blocks north of the Twin Towers. My brother was able to phone me and tell me he was safe and just trying to stop the sky from falling. This was after the first Tower fell and before the second. He had trouble calling our parents in Long Island. I called them and got through. I told them he was safe and they told me my sister was also safe. Although many lives were lost that day, I was grateful that my brother and sister were safe. I did not cry for the Towers that day, they were just metal objects that could be replaced. My brother and sister I could never replace and they were safe.

Today I still get emotional when I speak of that day. I remember at the first anniversary seeing a television documentary about the towers. I happened to be home alone. Ten minutes into the program, tears just started pouring down my face. I could not stop them and I could not stop watching the program. It was the first time I cried for this tragedy. I cried for the lives lost, I cried for the Towers lost, I cried for the lack of ability to stop the terrorists, and I cried for the loss of our personal freedom because of that day. I was and still am angry.

I auditioned and earned a role in a play about that day. The play was appropriately named “That Day in September”. I thought it would help give me closure. Now years after the terrorist act, I still get teary-eyed talking about the Towers.

Does my reaction mean that the terrorists won? I don’t think so. However, I don’t like to lose, ever, especially when I am right. We may all have our own thoughts about the action our government took in response to 9-11; however, there are some things we should all agree on. We were attacked. Our home was attacked. Our family was in harms way. Some of our family members (all Americans are family members) and our friends (all humans are our friends) were murdered by people I don’t consider to be human. I am still hurt and still angry. I know the stages of grief, and I know it will take a long time to work my way through them.

In history we have heard the phrases, “Never again” and “Never forget.” These should be our war cry. We may not be able to guarantee the first phrase, but we can the second. After the attack September 11, 2001 all planes flying in US air space were grounded. It caused a lot of hardship, but for obvious reasons it was necessary and we survived. I propose that every September 11 all planes, commercial and private be grounded for 24 hours in the United States. No planes take off, no planes land, no planes enter US air space. We must “Never Forget.”

RIP (Run in Peace)

Bill

Although I no longer live in New York, born and raised there, I will always be a New Yorker.
Every day we forward jokes, please take the time to forward this to every address in your address book, I did.

Four teams competed over a two day period that included Edge Athletics 16u and 17u, the Golden Eagles 16u from Hyde Park and the Killesters from Dublin, Ireland.  Following the final game on Thursday, the teams were treated to a barbecue and swim at the Santoro house.  “We were hoping to find some teams that were a bit better than us,” said Coach Gordan.  Although dropping all three games to the US teams, coach Gordan was pleased and excited for his team.  “it’s was a great for us to compete against the teams that Edge set up for us,” he said.  The Killesters are considered one of the top teams in their country and feature one of the top point guards for their age division.  All four games were competitive and had value for more than just the visiting team.  “This has been a great experience for our teams as well,” said Santoro.  “They were a class act on and off the court and our kids had the opportunity to socialize with athletes from another country in a  non competitive environment,” Santoro added.

Coach Gordan had been in the United States since mid June working at various camps and clinics in the US.  He is working towards his degree in Sports Management at a university in Dublin and hopes to make coaching his career.  For now, he coaches at the high school level and for the AAU equivalent in Dublin, Ireland.

The Killesters played the Edge 16u team on Thursday and exchanged t-shirts and stories over burgers and hot dogs, a typical all-American barbecue. The athletes found as many similarities in the their two cultures as there are differences.  Food was one thing both could relate to.  “We ate at Wendy’s last night after the games because we pretty much have everything the US has as far as fast food and chain restaurants go……except Wendy’s.  We don’t have that,” coach Gordan said.  But the barbecue added a warm friendly touch to the experience.  “It was a pleasure having them.  We had a chance to talk with coach Gordan, the athletes, and some of the parents that accompanied them,” Santoro said.  That talk has already lead to planning next years trip.  Only this time, Edge has been invited to come to their country.  “We will see what develops.  It takes enormous coordination, commitment, and of course money,” Santoro said.  Edge is already in the planning stages for 2011.  Only time will tell if those plans include a trip to Ireland.